Courage

You know those “Answer twenty questions and we’ll tell you a secret about you” sites that get posted on Facebook? Sometimes I can’t resist them.

I know if I really knew myself I’d never need to do them, but in a strange way, most of the time they are fun.

Until tonight I've never been surprised by one, usually I can answer their questions to get the resultI want. The one that promised to tell what state you’re born to inhabit. When I saw the first question I just knew that if I answered independently and brashly, and I’d get Texas. Proved my conjecture by taking it again and answered liberally and got California.

Tonight one promised to tell me what my “Most Dominant Character Trait” is. This one didn't have obvious answers that would lead to a specific trait. The answer surprised me.

It made me think, scary I know, but the result was one most people strive for, and even fear not having. If it’s true, I’m not so sure it’s a good thing.

For me the answer was, courage.

I've never considered myself to be courageous, in fact it’s not something I've thought too much about. I mean I've never worried about it. I know that many men worry about it, how they will face a situation that would require true courage. I've thought about those scenarios too, I think most men do, at some point. Some men let this question shape their self worth. I've always attributed it to people being desperate to be accepted. I usually don’t care what people think of me, the exceptions are my closest friends, and love ones. But I've never changed myself for acceptance. I've changed myself so I don’t hurt them, and in spite of their view of things it’s a constant process.

I’m one of those guys that has survived a lot of accidents, and injuries. Maybe courage has led me to take risk anyone else would avoid.

I've never been swayed by the crowd, in fact if it’s popular that’s a good enough reason for me to not like ‘whatever’.

Independent thinking is a trait I take to heart, and I usually find myself alone as a result, whenever issues are discussed. I rarely find myself on either side. I usually see both sides being pig headed and reactionary. I’m usually taking a stand against both sides. That’s no way to win.

I’m usually very conservative in my thinking, but rarely for the reasons of popular conservatism. I don’t agree with most harsh punishment for wrongdoing types, but for some crimes I just can’t see any other way to deal with it.

I definitely do not agree with modern liberalism. Idiots follow that crowd, probably because in that group they can feel smart at least every few minutes, as opinions shift in the swirling breezes. No one has the ability to shake a belief system founded in self deception, which is the true core of popular liberalism.

If this trait is true, it could explain a lot, and it answers that question most men ask themselves at some time or other. 

Does courage mean that I tend do do the right thing, even if it hurts me? Does courage lead me down a difficult path when there was an easier one back at the fork? Is courage what keeps me from doing the things that could prosper my family, but would also happen to take me over a line I can’t cross? Is it courage that makes me confront my family and friends when I see some unsavory motivation in their actions?

If all this is courage and it is my most dominate trait, then it could explain many failings in my life.

If so I could use some cowardice.

I can’t even accept courage as a dominant trait, a trait most men would give anything for. Thinking’s scary isn't it?